Night-time Ninja Battle...

I've recently learned something fuxinatingly wonderful from my son. Two weeks ago, I found a night light that has a green and blue setting. These two colors matter to him because he's really into a show (Ninjago) where his favorite characters are Jay (blue ninja) and Lloyd (green ninja). So I got the idea to put it in his room and let him pick what color ninja he wants to fall asleep to.

The first night he picked green because LLoyd is his favorite and the most powerful ninja. The second night he switched to blue but decided to put his little Lego ninja characters right by the light. So after he went to bed I decided to switch the light to green and knock Jay off the ledge. The next morning, no comment, nothing. The third night he turned the light to green but this time he brought more of the ninja characters to the "party", Cole (black), Kai (red), Zane (white). That night I stood Cole on top of the light, turned it off (black), and spread the other ninjas all over his dresser. The next morning, no comment, nothing.

Some version of this has gone on almost every night and every morning.  I just don't understand why he isn't waking up every morning with bated breath excited to share the news that the Ninja's battled through the night and So-n-so won!  Nothing.  So I've watched/studied him more intently and purposeful these past weeks to try and understand what is going on.

Does he not "believe"?  I think he does because he's made random comments throughout the day like "Lloyd won Dad" and it won't hit me until later that may have referenced the Night-time Ninja Battle.  Does he not care?  I think he does because even last night when Cole pulled the nightlight down and crushed the other ninja's with it, Miles woke up concerned it was completely dark in his room.  When I came in and showed him what had happened he smiled and climbed back into bed requesting Lloyd take over watch.

The answer I've come to is that we are different, just that, nothing more.  I'm more sensitive and often times find myself playing in a world where magic and wonderment are required.  Miles' play usually centers more around building things that are real.  Lego sets, paper airplanes, race cars made of boxes.  He also loves to play games so that he can win - such a competitive little dude.  So, in lieu of this discovery about me and my son being different but the same, I've learned (once again) that is the drill with all of us.  Nothing more, nothing less.  If I can remember and embrace this just a little more than most, I think I'll find some really amazing windows and doors into new ways to see and live my life.

Thanks Mi-Ti...

First call to Uncle Vin

Lily was riding her scooter at the park, hit a huge crack while coasting down a small hill and flipped over the front. First big wipe out. Per the protocol, I was able to manage the situation by talking about Uncle Vin, how brave he is and how proud he would be if she were to get right back on. She did.

When we got home she asked to call and tell him her story. They exchanged words like two vets and I could see her badge of courage solidifying itself on her chest. When they got off the phone she grabbed a wet towel, wiped her knees and asked for the medicine. I went to apply and she said, "I got it".

My mouth is permanently frozen in the open position, with a slight smile coming off the corners. She learned so much today about herself, her Uncle Vin and the power of getting up after you fall and trying again.

Pay attention David.

Tomareo is today

Woke up this morning to this. As stated yesterday by my wise 7 year old daughter, so far she was spot on...

Tomareo will be beter

Today hurt. I struggled to find flow, confidence, courage and joy. I got stuck in anger and stress and doubt and fear. I took things too seriously, too personally. I took ownership of far more than I should. With me that's a defense mechanism. It protects me from being told I failed.

Fortunately I'm surrounded by a few who care. A few who tried to pick me up and would do more if they could. A family who gave me space but filled it with love. I don't deserve that for sure.

My daughter had a rough day too. Julie encouraged her to write about it. She did and felt better. We both write every night in a "Happiness Journal" a friend gave me and tonight she wrote, "Today was not a good day, but tomareo will be beter". She drew a sad face. I wrote, "me too" adding tear drops coming from the "oo"s. She laughed, I did too.

Two boys led the way...

Every 6 months or so we get together with a group of local people who all adopted children from Ethiopia. These are great people and I love their seeing their children, but I have this terrible tendency to want to avoid social situations like this where I have to meet new people and socialize. It's really odd because most of the time I come away from events like this, finding some kind of magic, and today was no exception.

One of the women who has been coordinating this brought in 5 people from Ethiopia to begin the day with some cultural education. We watched a coffee making ceremony and learned the significance it has to bringing people together. They taught us how to write our children's names in Amharic. They prepared Ethiopian food and my favorite part is they taught us to dance.

At some point in the meal a 9 year old boy came and sat at our table in between me and another boy his age. I hadn't seen him at these gatherings before so I asked Julie and she told me he has only been in the states with his family for 6 months. CRAY. So I struck up a conversation with him and his friend. I asked them what grade they were in, letting them know I was only in the 5th grade myself. I asked they played any sports, letting them know my brother Miles and I just started playing basketball. We carried on chatting for a while and they continually called my bluff while my kids jumped in to confirm my true age. We were ALL smiling and laughing.

After lunch, the boys took Miles and went up on this little stage to dance while I found myself sitting at the table alone with a total stranger. I had briefly met her while putting on our name tags where I mentioned to Lily that I was writing my name in my favorite color and before I could say blue, this woman said "Packer green?" So I asked her if she came all the way from Wisconsin just for this and she told me a story that lit me up...

She is a member of a Facebook group where people share information about adopted children to learn if there are other biological siblings adopted in the US or additional information like that. She told me one day a post came up that asked if there was anyone who adopted a child with really specific information: Ethiopian full name, birthday and adopted by a single mother... it was her. She responded to the post and discovered that her daughter was the younger sister of one of the boys I was chatting with at lunch. Both families learned information about their children's stories they didn't know before. She told me that she always thought she was going to adopt again but when this happened, these strangers were now family, and that was that.

By now, the boys came back and asked me to come dance with them. I was so inspired, I did. THEY LED ME up on stage and GUIDED ME to the front and center, even asked me to face the room. I LOOKED TO THEM FOR DIRECTION and they expected me to let go and dance, I did. The room began clapping in unison for us, before long there were several other kids on stage who weren't before and we were ALL smiling and laughing. A room full of strangers coming together, led into dance by 2 young boys. Humbling.

The song ended but the energy continued. We were connected now and it was the magic of community. I was lost in the moment and reminded once again how much I love connecting with children - it's why I went into education. Eventually it was time to go and I walked around saying goodbyes to everyone I saw like I had known them for years. Today I relearned a lesson for the ump-teenth time. Know your tendencies the good and bad ones. Lean against the bad and watch the good take over. If you do this more, you might just find some kind of Beauty In The Everyday life.

Thank you N and S, you 2 boys are well on your way to changing the world one schlep like me at a time.

The power of energy...

Mass attracts mass, energy works in the same way - today I got some of this good shit. My morning started with a great discussion around solving a problem. I LOVE those convo's. We got into a great flow. Me with my abstract concepts, what if's and can we's. The other intently listening with an OPEN mind, a strong core and insatiably curious questions. Walked out with energy galore.

Then, spent some time with a crazy one who is more deeply connected to me than distinct but our distinction is really complimentary to one another making us a better team than individuals. We stumbled onto a thought that continues to bring clarity around a very exciting project we're working on.

I drove to a company meeting where I watched people come together from all departments and participate in the concept we believe in around MOVING physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually TOGETHER. It's really humbling that anyone shows up and not something Kevin and I take lightly. Left that meeting having ate Vegemite for the first time: a consistency like tar the saltiest thing I've ever tasted and on cloud 9.

Ended the work day talking with the same crazy from earlier to add the cherry on top. Headed home and plugged my phone in so that I could give my kids a little of the energy others gave to me today. Sure enough, they gave me more than I gave them and now I'm sitting with a natural buzz you can't get from any pill or drug.

Remember David, your energy attracts the same. Are you giving the good shit or just shit? Be awake and aware, days like these are rare.

My Big, Fat...

I'm just getting over an end of the year flu, the 24 hour variety. Always a good reminder for how fragile life is. I'm lucky right now and physically feel good 99.9% of my days. I usually can't imagine life not being healthy, that is until I'm not. Funny huh? On top of that, it's New Year's Eve, another notorious time for reflection.

I decided not to do any long term resolutions, just practice a few disciplines like one might during Lent. I can't say this idea is original, it's actually my version of something two of my brothers have been doing for years. They both give up alcohol during January as a cleansing and checkpoint... discipline. Since I hardly ever drink alcohol, I decided that I was going to stop drinking soda, eating french fries and eating sweet snacks. That's right, I said sweet snacks. For 38 years of my life I really didn't like or give a second thought about eating cookies or sweets and then I did. Fuxinating.

I started about a week ago and so far so good. I definitely felt a sugar withdrawal and was starving for something sweet. So, so weird/crazy/cool how your body acts (read 'Body and Soul Regulations'). But I think I'm over it and enjoying feeling a sense of ownership over a part my physical self and accomplishment over setting a goal and sticking to it. Oddly enough, these little wins make a huge difference.

Ah-ha, there it is, my big fat New Year's resolution is to do this just a little more: set small goals that have a purpose and do it. I welcome ideas or more so your success stories. God knows we all can use enCOuRagEment. Happy 2013, here's to a year we are all awake enough to see more Beauty In The Everyday and when we do, BITE life!